Retribution
by Jageroux
Summary: It all started with Kuroyagi's Rebellion, which sparked a spin off which left people asking Roxas 'Why' which was promptly followed by Shedauwz' disturbing Retaliation. Follow the crack filled quest of these three authors as they seek Retribution. Purely comical with a crazy plot.


...This escalated quickly.

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Disclaimer: All rights go to their respective owners. Nuff Said.

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They did what they had to do. They regretted nothing. Even as the world and their fans turned against them, they held fast. If they didn't do it, who would? Who would step up to the plate and give that fat bastard what he deserved? No, there was no remorse. Even as their fans hurled insults at them, and un-fave'd them and their stories. They held fast. They went through all of the motions. The arrest. The trial. They beat the charges. Temporary insanity they pleaded. It worked. But they came out ruined.

They had next to no one. Most of their fans turned their backs on them and insulted them and their stories. They weren't allowed into any fandoms. They were on their own. The fandoms they dedicated hours to supporting, shunned them. Those hours they spent creating quality stories were flushed down the drain as their supporters slandered their stories. They kept their heads low, and gradually disappeared out of the public eye.

One of them though, a black haired man with a black trench coat and red lining, would not stand for it. He would not allow his two friends to be slandered and insulted for the situation he caused. No, he would bring them back to their former glory. Nay, he would make them greater than they were before. He would make those 'fans' that turned against them regret doing so. He would have-

_**Retribution.**_

* * *

_Dive Bar in the slums of Mexico._

A lone white haired man in a red trench coat sat down at in the bar, or cantina as it was called in that area of the world. He was drunk. Ever since his fall and the betrayal he suffered from his fans, he found his solace in alcohol. It numbed everything. He wasn't forced to remember all of the insults and slandering of his name. He felt broken when he found out his account was closed because of all of the hate PMs he was sent. He was no longer a writer. He was nothing more than a washed up, alcoholic has been.

He raised his hand, ordering another shot of tequila. The bartender came over and refilled his shot glass. He watched as the white haired man took it and gulped it down as if he was dying from thirst. The white haired man slammed the glass on the counter before nodding, signaling the bartender to pour more. The bartender did as he was asked and refilled the glass. He watched as the white haired man guzzled the liquid down and once again slammed the glass on the cabinet before nodding his head again.

The bartender sighed and simply sat the bottle of tequila down in front of him. The white haired man reached out and gripped the bottle by the neck. He took a moment to breath; a single moment of clarity filled his mind as he thought about what he had become. He used to be a respected author, now he was this. He sighed as he brought the bottle to his lips and he drunk from it. He placed the bottle back on the counter as he cried inside.

Why? Why did he have to do it? At first he blamed the black haired man who instigated the situation, but he soon realized, he made the choice. He made the choice to pick up that dildo. He made the choice to join in on beating that fat and jolly son of a bitch to death. He didn't regret it. No. Not one bit. Why should he? He made the world a better place, even if said world's inhabitants hated him for it. If he was given the choice, he would do it all over again. He sighed as he took a quick swing of the alcohol and rubbed his face as sweat graced his forehead. He felt it trail down the side of his cheeks. He chuckled at the fact that if anyone saw him, it would appear as though he was crying. He wasn't, no, he had been run out of tears to shed.

"What kind of sorry ass shit is this supposed to be?" The black haired man, Roxas, asked the white haired man, Shedauwz, though for this story he will simply be referred to as Dauwz.

The white haired man, Dauwz, looked up and smirked as he saw the annoyed face of his friend.

"Drink?" He asked as he waved the bottle of tequila in front of the black haired man who simply glared. Roxas walked up to him before yanking the bottle out of his hand and handing it to the bartender.

"C'mon." He said as he grabbed Dauwz by the back of his coat and dragged him out of the cantina. The white haired man raised his hands to the sky to block the sun, which he hadn't seen in years seeing as how he spent most of his time in the cantina. The sun's rays shone down on them. Roxas allowed Dauwz to gather his bearing seeing as how it'd been years since he had been outside the cantina. The white haired man released a groan as Roxas led him to the troth, what horses drank out of, before he shoved Dauwz' head in it. He struggled to hold his head under the water before pulling the white haired man's head out allowing him to breath.

Dauwz glared at him as he huffed and breathed in as much air as he could.

"The hell?" he asked as he continued to breathe heavily and Roxas sighed.

"Well, in cowboy movies, when someone is drunk that's what they would do. And," He said as he gestured to Dauwz who was suddenly no longer drunk, "it worked."

Dauwz nodded as he folded his arms and eyed the black haired man suspiciously. What did he want? It'd been years since they last saw each other. There were no hard feelings between them, but he didn't expect to see the man again.

"Why are you here? I highly doubt it's to make me stop drinking." He asked as Roxas folded his arms and closed his legs.

"This is shit. We do the world a favor and all of our 'fans' turn on us. I feel, and I know you do as well, betrayed. We need to remind them why they liked us. I refuse to live the rest of my life in 'shame' because we got rid of that fat bastard." Roxas said angrily as he began to exude flames like shadows from his shoulders.

Dauwz nodded. Just like Roxas said, he did feel betrayed. He wanted to rise back up to his former glory and remind the world's inhabitants why he was great. Though, when he thought about it, he was known for writing stories, not _doing_ anything.

"What do you have in store?" Dauwz asked, curious as to what Roxas has planned. His face instantly paled when he saw the black haired man grin.

"First, we must get Kuro." He said as they walked off and got in the jet that was just so conveniently placed behind them.

* * *

_Family House in the suburbs._

They parked the jet on the side walk and examined the house Kuroyagi now lived in.

White picket fence surrounding a white two story house with a red door. Completely normal and no one would expect the once great, and still great, author lived here. The walked past the picket fence, up to the door. Roxas took a deep breath before knocking.

They stood there before they heard a feminine voice answer.

"One second!" the voice said and Roxas and Dauwz exchanged puzzled looks. Kuro had a woman? Or…maybe….Kuro….._was_…..NO. Nope! Not even gonna go there.

They waited eagerly to see who the woman was.

They bit their lips as they saw the door knob rattle and stared expectantly as the door opened.

Their eyes instantly widened as they saw a white haired woman, with G sized breast obviously, wearing a tee-shirt and tight fitting jeans that showed off those awesome child bearing hips. They knew those were awesome child bearing hips due to the fact that she was carrying a child in her arms.

Dauwz' jaw dropped as Roxas covered his mouth with his hands to prevent himself from laughing.

"Ah! Dauwz, Roxas, what brings you to by?" Shé, Dauwz' female twin, asked as she cradled the baby in her arms. Dauwz turned around and glared at Roxas who held his hands up and chuckled.

Dauwz coughed as he looked at the woman.

"You, uh, have a baby…." He stated as she smiled sweetly.

"Indeed I do."

Roxas was dying on the inside until he realized.

"Wait, doesn't Kuro live here?" He asked as a brown haired man wearing a tee shirt,Kuro, walked up beside Shé and wrapped an arm around her waist and pulling her close. He eyed his friends suspiciously.

"Sup guys. Been a while." He said as they nodded and Roxas narrowed his eyes.

"So, erm, you two….are roommates?" Roxas asked as Kuro sighed and shook his head.

"We're dating." He said simply as Dauwz and Roxas' eyes both widened.

"Is that so? T-Then….who's that baby's father?" Dauwz asked fearing the answer.

Kuro chuckled before smiling innocently, "I am."

Dauwz chewed the inside of his mouth as Roxas nodded.

"If you don't mind my asking…..How was that child conceived?" Roxas asked bluntly and Kuro narrowed his eyes.

"When she raped me." Kuro replied as Shé chuckled.

"Ah, I see. Well, you all seem happy." Dauwz remarked feeling a little at ease due to the fact Shé wasn't his female clone/counterpart but his twin sister.

"Anyway, what do you guys want?" Kuro asked sensing they were up to something.

"Can we like, come in?" Roxas asked, tired of standing on his feet.

"Hell N-"

"Of course!" Shé replied, cutting off Kuro as the two other men walked inside. They were surprised to see the inside of the house had a 'homey' feel to it. Roxas and Dauwz instantly sat down on the couch in the living room as Kuro glared at them. Shé playfully slapped Kuro's shoulder as she went upstairs to lay the baby in his crib.

"So," Dauwz said looking over to Kuro, "how's life been treating you?"

"Life's been good. I have a job. A girlfriend. A Baby. I don't' want anything else." Kuro said sternly already expecting what they were up too.

Roxas groaned as he laid back into the sofa, "You don't want the fame back? You're like the progenitor of the NaZa fan fiction. Now, people don't even say your name. NaZa is dying because anyone that writes NaZa is immediately called a Kuro-lover and shunned."

Kuro let out a sigh as he closed his eyes. He knew this. It pained him to watch his favorite pairing be drug through the mud. There was nothing they could do. He secretly wished he would have just let Santa have his way with him. At least then NaZa would be safe and thriving in fandom communities.

On second thought, being raped by a creepy and fat old man is NOT worth it…..maybe. He glanced at Roxas and Dauwz' faces and he folded. He'd regret this eventually, but he'd play along.

"Tell me what we intend to do, and I'll help out. BUT, as soon as shit gets heavy, I'm leaving." He said as Dauwz and Roxas grinned.

He'd wind up regretting this.

"What the hell are we going to do?" He asked as Roxas stood up and walked over to him before placing a hand on his shoulder.

"It's freakin' epic." Roxas said and Kuro's heart nearly stopped. When Roxas said something was epic, it was bound to be disastrous.

"You know, now that I think about it, Roxas still hasn't told me the plan." Dauwz admitted as he eyed the black haired man curiously.

"Well the plan is-"

"The plan won't be discussed until the next chapter because the Author wants a cliffhanger." Shé said coming down the stairs and interrupting the conversation.

"Now, who wants cookies?" The white haired woman asked as they all raised their hands.

Yeah, shit's getting real in the next chapter.

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"What are you talking about?" Kuro asked as they all walked outside later that night and got in the jet.

Roxas shrugged as they all got in and sat inside before they flew off.

* * *

_3 days later_

_We were trying to get Retribution. We never expected this. It came out of nowhere. Well, it came out of Korea to be precise but shut your damn mouth. _

The three of them silently and cautiously made their way through an abandoned parking lot.

"Shit, we need to be more careful." Dauwz warned as they crouched down low and moved towards the exit of the parking lot while using the cars as cover.

"How many bullets do you guys have left? I still have a full clip." Kuro said as Dauwz checked his waist.

"I have a full clip too." He said as Roxas looked inside his jacket.

"I have a knife, a porno mag, and two clips." Roxas said as Dauwz looked back.

"Give me the porno mag." Dauwz commanded as Roxas handed it to him before he stuck it in his pocket.

"Seriously? We're in a life or death situation and you two are sharing porn?" Kuro asked slightly irked as Roxas and Dauwz exchanged a quick bro fist. Then they heard it. They heard what they feared the most.

_Oppa Gangnam style, Gangnam style  
Oppa Gangnam style, Gangnam style  
Oppa Gangnam style_

"Shit, here they come." Dauwz said as he peeked over a car and nearly died. These weren't the regular mindless Oppa-zombies. These were different. Dangerous. He watched as six naked women, with extremely large breast, did the Gangnam Dance. He watched as their breast bounced up and down. Up and down.

_Oppa Gangnam style, Gangnam style  
Oppa Gangnam style, Gangnam style  
Oppa Gangnam style_

"Oi. How many are there?" Kuro asked as Roxas peeked over the car and immediately went slack jawed. Kuro sighed and peeked over as well and his nose bled slightly. The women noticed them before their nipples shot out bullets like a machine gun and they immediately ducked.

"….."

"…."

"….."

"What the fuck is this?" Dauwz asked as the bullets slammed into the car they hid behind.

Roxas just shook his head and shrugged while Kuro muffled his laughter.

Out of all of the thing they've been through, this took the cake.

"So, what are we going to do?" Kuro asked as Roxas and Dauwz both cocked their guns and stood up while aiming at the naked women.

The camera slowed down as it panned in showing the bullets fly past them as they shot. Their bullets were precise. Clean shot to their hearts. The camera panned out as the naked women were hit and fell down dead. They were caught off guard as more naked women with booby machine guns came at them from behind.

The authors seeking slid across another car and while they did so, they turned around and aimed at the women. The camera slowed down as they began shooting. Their bullets hit the women's boobie bullets in mid-air. They continued shooting with a few of their bullets hitting the women. Kuro stifled a groan as he was shot in the shoulder.

Dauwz cursed as he picked him up and Roxas continued shooting trying to cover them. They turned and ran as the women continued to follow after them slowly seeing as how they were dancing.

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The authors turned a corner out of the parking lot and stopped as they saw a shark wearing a tuxedo and who had legs. He was leaned against a penis shaped cloud and was smoking weed as he nodded to them.

"Dauwz….." Roxas growled as Dauwz and Kuro instantly paled.

"Are you fucking serious? Why are you here?" Dauwz asked the shark who simply smiled.

"Thought you boys may need some help. It appears you do." The shark said nodding at Kuro.

"I'd prefer to bleed out than get in that penis shaped car with you." Kuro said with a twitching eye as the Shark, his name was Mr. Dumpling, The Fuck from the Sea who did not give a fuck.

"Is that so? Then I can just leave you boys here to deal with those boobie machine gun women." Mr. Dumpling said as they all gulped. They didn't have much of a choice.

"So long as you don't try anything funny." Roxas demanded as Mr. Dumpling nodded before he expertly whipped out his dick and brushed it against the penis cloud. A door opened and Mr. Dumpling crawled in before the authors approached the cloud warily. They crawled in and were instantly uncomfortable.

The 'seats', 'floor', 'roof' were all made from cloudy penis shaped objects and they groaned.

"I'm not sitting down." Roxas said sternly as Mr. Dumpling chuckled.

"That's what you think~" Mr. Dumpling said as their faces all paled.

"Prepare to fuck off!" Mr. Dumpling shouted as penis shaped seat belt came out of the seats before wrapping around the author's waists and pulling them into the seats.

Roxas groaned as he felt the penis formed seats pressing against him while Dauwz and Kuro did the same.

"I hate this."

"This is disgusting."

"Can we get out?"

"Nope." Mr. Dumpling replied to their complaints as a cloudy penis was shoved into Kuro's shoulder wound to stop the bleeding.

"OH MY GOD! GET IT OUT OF ME! GET IT OUT!" Kuro yelled as Roxas and Dauwz were restrained by the penis seatbelts.

"Off to Gaylandia we go gentleboys~. Off to Gaylandia we go~." Mr. Dumpling said as the penis shaped cloud fucked off to the sky as they headed to Gaylandia.

Damn they were fucked. And that just may be literal.

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This was fun to write xD Very fun.

To Be Continued In: Escape From Gaylandia

Next Chapter will include FT Characters!


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